Friday, June 19, 2009

Pastor David Bayly: The Legitimate Shooting of Pregnant Women to Prevent Abortion Should Be Under Civilian Authority

Heeding President Obama's call for more civic service, David Bayly, pastor of Christ the Word, Toledo, Ohio, a Presbyterian Church in America congregation, inspired by his BFF pastor Douglas Wilson, uses his sermon to offer a plan:

If there should come a time when shots are legitimately fired to prevent the murder of babies in America, it will be—as in the American Revolution and the Civil War—when those who shoot do so under civil authority....

Granted, since about 35% of American women will have had an abortion by age 45, shooting so many pregnant women might be a tad counterproductive. But not necessarily. When you're pastor David Bayly and you declare "I will follow a man who can rise from the dead. You will too, if you have any sense.", maybe you just want to make sure there are enough risen-from-the-dead types for all of us to follow around.

Read the rest, as they say, and make sure not to miss such gems as this:

Where is legitimate authority found to oppose the king or president appointed by God? The answer is, God raises lesser authorities to confront higher authorities.

Got that? God appoints the president and then God raises lesser authorities to confront the president God appointed. Like, totally brilliant!

Last, but not least, when pastor David Bayly exhorts you to understand and declare:

Jesus is God. He is King. He is Lord. This has earthly implications which we must understand and declare. Jesus is Lord. ALL earthly authority belongs to Him.

you better do it. Like so:

Viva La Theocracy! ... Off With the Heads of Non-[Resurrected Corps]Believers!

PS: Pastor David Bayly, stop telling President Obama to kiss boys. If the President [k]iss[es] the Son there will be rejoicing of homosexuals (you know how these people do, at the drop of an abomination) and that's just haraam.

Also, not to get all prudish and all but, srsly, there is such a thing as TMI:

I am a pastor of little note ministering in a not-overly-large church in a not-overly-significant city....insignificant pastors such as myself, never even knowing I exist...[President Obama] you rule over me....You had me at "Hello", Mr. President...I am a pea, a gnat, a worm before you in every earthly sense....whoo-cchhhhh, cracks whip on bare skin for emphasis...though a worm in earthly terms, I wield a mighty sword....*wink, wink*, *nudge, nudge*...I wield the Sword of the Spirit, the Word of God....while sporting sensible, yet chic, soft, velvet...chains of human insignificance and small-town unimportance.

Pastor David Bayly, dude, sometimes a sword is just a sword, but soft, velvet chains are never just what they are claimed to be.



Post a Comment

<< Home